Dating, Relationships

Double D’s can serve you well…

Hmmmmm?? What the heck are you talking about right? Double D’s? Yes I said it! Double D’s do you have them? First off, let me start off by saying I am NOT talking about your bra size. I am actually talking about Desire and Depth. Think about it when we start dating someone or choose to go out on a date with an individual, often times we have something in mind that we DESIRE. Whether its marriage, companionship with sex (yes I said it and many are looking for just that alone), lots of stability (aka men/women with money no love needed), a sense of entitlement, or just a hanging buddy to have a good laugh with. No matter what the desire we ALL DESIRE something!!!  Now the question then becomes to what DEPTH are you willing to go to gain what you DESIRE? Some of us have no depth at all, meaning we don’t think that much into it. Some of us have a great deal of depth and we can sometimes put too much thought into it. Either way, they come into play at some point in the process of interacting with one another. I am having the most interesting time figuring out what ones DESIRES and to what DEPTHS they wish to pursue those desires with me? I am a divorced mother of two and dating with kids IS NOT an easy tasks. There are so many variables that have to be considered when taking things to the NEXT level. This is why having those double d’s in mind are so important. I would even say for those who don’t have kids, you have a gamble you are taking as well if you don’t place those two areas into focus. Why? Well let’s look at it this way, when you have children, a business, a vision/dream you are raising/building, the last thing you need is someone who throws the entire unit off balance. You must know what you desire from them and to what depths you are willing to exchange with them in attaining it. So to help you find, keep and maintain your Double D perspective, here are some quick steps to take: 1) Desire- Rate on a scale of 1-10 how important this is to you and don’t change it according to the person in front of you at the moment. It is what it is and if they don’t fit, don’t try to make it work. 2) Depth- Decide how much time should be dedicated to see this desire fulfilled. Will it take 2 dates, 2 months of dating, 2 years of dating? How long are you willing to wait to see it come to pass? Also how much energy in that time frame are you putting into this person? Again this all depends on the time frame in which you want to see your desire fulfilled. 3) Respect- Only you know how important these desires are to you. No one will respect, cherish or honor your aspirations like you will. You also must learn to disagree agreeably with those who don’t wish to walk the path with you. Everyone isn’t your match made in heaven and that’s ok. And that’s it! If you were looking for more I am so sorry to disappoint you. Honestly life really doesn’t have to be that complicated and my goal is to help you see the simplicity in it. What you desire in life is your right and makes up who you are. Everyone isn’t going to want to tag along and in other instances many may. What you have to decide is who is deserving of being a part of your inner most DESIRES and to what DEPTHS you are willing to go to let them in. Much love! Cole