Dating, Relationships

50 Shades of Grey is NOT Ok…

Have you ever played the “I can be what you need me to be” role? Have you ever found yourself in limbo with a person, position, or decision that you had to make and found it simpler to play in the grey? When I say play in the grey, I am saying you actually live, breathe, eat, sleep and play in a role that is NOT you. You say you can “just be friends” when in reality you yearn to know what its like to be more. You say you are ok with taking on a position or role that is way beyond your experience or desires of choice; while inside secretly wanting something or someone else. So why do we do this? Why do we often try on 50 Shades of Grey? Is it fear of losing? Is it the unbearable thought of having to go it alone in something? Is it due to lack of belief that you can or should ask for or have more? Or could it be just a matter of comfort and predictability? No matter the reason 50 Shades of Grey is NOT OK. Here’s why: 1) The only person who ever gets hurt or damaged will be you

  • The person or entity you are playing in the grey for will reap much reward, while you suffer by not being true to self
  • Being in the grey is a place of instability. You will never truly know where you stand for grey is always complicated
  • You deny yourself the chance to be truly happy and fulfilled by sacrificing your desires for someone elses
2) You are not in control when you play in the grey
  • Manipulation is the key player in this role. It does not play fair and it controls you by using your desires against you
  • Deception is what you fall prey to both as the player and the opponent. You are not who you say and the battle you fight is within to maintain a role that does not fit you nor is good for you
  • Emotions run extremely high like a roller coaster ride. At any time the tide can turn and immense pain and suffering can and will appear
No matter how you slice it Grey is meant to Prey on your weaknesses and cause you to deter from your desires and needs. When seeking a relationship with anyone, both personal or professional I advise you to be black or white. You will remain clear on the intent of the individual and you will not have to play any games to gain the ultimate goal desired. If you mix black and white for a shade of grey, you are only asking to be placed in an endless cycle of plans that go nowhere fast. Grey may get you laid, but can and will get your heart slayed. Grey may even get you paid, but will devalue and degrade. Grey can seem to work just fine for a great amount of time, but in the end grey always leaves you left behind. My friend I tell you this with all sincerity and with a soft plea, 50 Shades of Grey is NOT OK. How do I know? 50 Shades of Grey was me. Cole